Confession time

I want to be a runner. 

There, I've said it. 

I'm secretly envious of those people that can call themselves that. 

Once upon a time I did the couch to 5K program and then transitioned inside to a treadmill when the weather got crappy and would do it for 45 min to an hour, every day.  But I never felt like a "runner".  I want to be one of those people happily running outside, in any kind of weather, because they WANT to.  Because it makes them feel good. 

I have a million excuses for why I haven't started running.  Weather, we live on top of a huge hill, my knees are a disaster, I don't have good headphones...yeah...I have a million lame excuses.

I'm struggling right now with the weather one..and a biggie...that I'm trying to get pregnant and if my last pregnancy is a good indicator, I'm going to have to shut down physical activity pretty quickly.  Last time I couldn't even vacuum without bleeding or having contractions. 

But...it could take a long time to get pregnant....and every bit of running, dieting, changing eating habits, etc is NOT going to be for naught. 

Every pound I lose before getting pregnant is one less pound I will have to lose afterwards to get to my goal weight. 

And maybe being in better shape this time will help my body handle the physical stresses of pregnancy... 

And with every BFN I get, I can get one month further along in my resolve to be healthier and to be a better role model for my son. 

So...tonight I will restart the couch to 5K program....

...if its not raining ;)